Megatokyo: Language Learning
by Da-Nuke
Summary: A rather short story that came into my mind. After successfully teaching Ping some English, Largo discovers that she can learn a language, and therefore, he decides to write an English language module for her.
1. Introduction

This fanfic is based on the webcomic Megatokyo by Fred Gallagher, and I just had the urge to write this little thing. I've always wondered how could Largo be able to communicate with Ping and overcome the language barrier, especially considering that the Ping-Largo couple is kinda weird and interesting: anybody would say that a die-hard gamer that finds it hard to stay in the real world, dating a robot girl that runs on a dating sim software, goes against the laws of nature, don't ya think?  



	2. Part 1: The Lesson

Ping and Largo were inside their department above MegaGamers. Piro wasn't there, and Largo was worrying already; he didn't came home for an entire day already, and Largo was already getting really nervous. He had previously tried to phone in Piro, expecting him to have Kimiko's cell phone; but he didn't.

Largo was already getting really upset. Did he possibly went out on a night date with Kimiko at a pub, got really drunk, and ended up staying at Kimiko's crib, to stay with her or do something else until 3:00 PM? Largo was already making up a lot of speculations, when suddenly, she had an idea.

That robot girl Piro talks with all the time. Probably she knows at least a little something about the whereabouts of Piro. Or at least what Piro possibly told her before leaving. Yeah, that was the ticket! Now he could know whether to find Piro, or to ask Junpei, Largo's l337 disciple.

But how could Largo actually engage in a conversation with this girl?

"Dammit", Largo thought. "That's the problem! I can't speak her 3vil, arcane tongue. How am I gonna be able to actually communicate with her? How am I gonna be able to understand what she says?"

Then, in a sudden flash of thought, Largo remembered.

"My Spanish classes in middle school! Yeah, that's the ticket! The teacher started with something like 'Yo soy Armando. ¿Quién eres tú?'. Yeah! I perfectly remember!", Largo thought. "Maybe if I use that same technique to communicate with Ping, and teach her some English, she will be able to communicate with me! Got it! Yeah!".

So Largo got up from his couch and walked towards Ping. She was plugged into the electric outlet, charging her battery while sleeping, so Largo woke her up.

- Hmmmm... Largo-san? - she asked.  
- Yeah, that's me, you little weirdo robot girl. I don't usually speak to you, but I need to now - Largo answered.  
- Ano... - muttered Ping. Obviously, she wasn't understanding a thing.  
- OK, Ping. Let's take this thing seriously. I don't know your ancient 3vil tongue, nor do you know my modern, righteous tongue. So I want you to pay attention - said Largo. Obviously, Ping couldn't understand a thing, and she was still staring blankly at Largo in confusion.

Largo then sat down in the floor in front of Ping, and started speaking at her.  
- I am Largo - he said, while notoriously gesticulating and pointing towards himself. Then he pointed towards Ping. - You, are Ping. Who am I?  
Ping was still staring in confusion, but it seemed like she was actually understanding something.  
- I am Largo. You are Ping. Who are you? You are Ping. Who am I? - repeated Largo.  
Ping's face finally became happier, as she had finally understood what Largo was saying.  
- You... are... Larugo... - she awkwardly muttered.  
- Good! Yeah! Nice one. You understood! - said Largo in a happy mood. - Now, once again. You are Ping. Who are you?  
- I... am... Pingu-chan.  
- Good! Nice one. Now, I want you to repeat.  
- Repeat?  
- Yes. Repeat. I am Largo. I repeat. I am Largo. You repeat. You say "I am Largo".  
- Say...  
- Who are you?  
- I am Ping-chan.  
- You say "I am Ping-chan". Understand? Now repeat. - Largo took a picture of Piro, who she instantly identified by the look on her face. - He is Piro. He is my friend. He is your friend. Who is he?  
- He... is... Piro-neesan.  
- Good! Now I need you to tell me a little more. We're almost done by now. I am here - said Largo while pointing downwards. - Where am I? I am here. - Then he moved away a couple of meters. - Where am I? I am there. - Largo now returned to his previous position. - Now, answer.  
- Answer? - asked Ping.  
- Who am I? I answer. I am Largo. Who are you? Answer.  
- I am Ping-chan. I answer.  
- Good! Now, answer. Where am I?  
- You are here.  
- Excellent! Now look - said Piro while pointing towards his eye. Then he fetched Piro's sketchbook and a pencil, and he drew a house figure. - This is a house. What is this? A house. Now answer. What is this?  
- A house. This is a house.  
- Excellent! They made you a fast learner! Now, draw.  
- Draw?  
Largo then did a quick sketch of Ping and showed it to her.  
- I draw you. Now, where is Largo? Draw.  
Largo then handed him Piro's sketchbook and his pencil. Ping finally understood: Largo wanted her to draw where did Largo went. Effectively, Largo went out into a pub with Kimiko, and that's what she drew on the paper. After Largo took a look at Ping's drawing, Largo didn't know who was the girl.  
- Who is her? - said Largo.  
- She is Nanasawa Kimiko - said Ping.  
"Ah, so that's the ticket. Piro went out and got really wasted with Kimiko. This guy is kinda weird. I mean, I'm the official b33r drinker here! Something fishy is going on...", thought Piro.  
- OK, Ping, we're done. Finish. The end. Thanks for your help! - said Largo while bowing.

Largo was seriously thinking that something was wrong. Piro was condamned to die a virgin, especially because he gets really nervous only with the presence of a girl. But his engagement with Kimiko... that meant that Piro really got the balls to ask her, and that's something a man should be proud of. There was no reason anymore to call Piro a faggot, especially now that he can actually get to hang out with a real girl and not with a lame-ass metallic girl.

Suddenly, Largo realized something he didn't during all this time. Largo was actually teaching English to Ping, and she did learned the language to be able to understand what Largo said! That means Ping has the ability to learn different languages like a normal human! How could she do that? That means Ping doesn't does like a normal computer that reads a word and looks it up into a dictionary to find out what it means. That means Ping's language module works just like the human speech: a word is mapped to a concept in the mind! Whoever did that was a real genius. And Ping managed to grasp the English grammar! That means she has the universal rules of the language inside her brain! Largo started to look at the possibilities that impiles. Writing a language module for Ping would be as easy as writing an express English lesson for her that would make her learn English in 5 minutes of run time! Moreover, that means that, if he can reverse engineer Ping's language module, that means he'll be able to unlock the key to universal language learning! He shall win thousands of dollars and become filthy rich, he would be able to return to America, and he would be able to harness an entire new convention 10 times better than the E3 he was kicked from before he and Largo fled towards Japan! He would become the best man in the universe, and he would afford to the most expensive hoes in the world!

Piro had decided it already. His new great project would be to write a comprehensive English lesson that Ping would run, and this way, she'll be able to communicate with Largo and with everyone in America. Rejoicing in his new discovery, Largo locked himself into his room and started to work on his new invention. 


	3. Part 2: The Preamble

**Largo's Work Journal. June 14, 2006.**  
"Today is the beginning of a new era in language psychology. Today is the day where the greatest linguistics project ever will start. Today will be a day remembered forever in the yearbooks of history. Because today, today, is the day where I will begin the Project Disassemble Ping.

Why do I start this project? Very simple. Piro has been missing all night long, and I figured out that Ping, that freaky robot girl he hangs out with all the time, would know where he is. But Ping, unfortunately, can only speak the Undead Queen's arcane, 3vil tongue. So it was my job to make myself understand. I used the same tactic that most language teachers use to jump start the knowledge of a completely unknown language: a combination of very simple phrases and a lot of gesticulation.

Little did I know, that the humanoid robotic device Sony SCPH-18333, codename "Ping", was actually learning English like a normal human. I found out shortly after she managed to tell me where did Piro went. Most modern speech recognition systems have a hard-coded vocabulary that reads a word and does whatever that word means, like a command shell. Ping, however, has a vocabulary with words mapped to concepts. Like a normal human brain. I also discovered, by the speed with which she grasped the basic English grammar, that she has a set of built-in grammar rules that she just has to alter in order to learn a language. Like a young child.

Many linguists have been endlessly working during many years to do that, and now the engineers at Sony managed to do it. Perhaps they did it in case they decided to launch it overseas: it would be much easier to just upload the language rules into a whole freight intended to be sold at a certain place, than to write separate languages for each locale. That would be really expensive, because although the languages of the Second World are pretty much limited to Spanish, Arabic, Russian and Hebrew, the tongues of the First World includes Chinese, English, French, German, Dutch, Polish, Russian, Norwegian, Italian, Icelandic and many other languages.

But they still created the language rules that a small child has inside his head! They followed the inverse path: instead of finding the rules, they created them. And they gotta be quite natural to allow Ping to learn English.

I can't still count everything that discovery implies. The language learning market is flooded with language methods that all claim to be superior to the rest; this would be a major innovation, because it would allow for a completely seamless and intuitive method. The language rules could be converted into computer code, and be used to build an automatic translation system that could actually create a translation that actually looks human, not like a Babelfish translation.

But the 2 biggest possibilities are: the creation of a truly universal language, and the creation of an universal translation system! Instant translation would be possible! Imagine being able to talk with Kimiko over the cell phone. She would speak the Undead Queen's tongue, but I would not listen to her 3vil words; instead, I would listen a righteous English speech. She would not hear me speaking English; she would hear me speak the 3vil language! Oh my God, I shall become filthy rich!

The first thing I will do, in order to grasp the knowledge of Ping's language system, will be to write her an English module. Not only it would allow me to communicate with her, it might even allow me to make her tell me her inner structure and composition. Then I will start reverse-engineering her programming, analyze it with the help of a linguist, and finally, we both would publish the Universal Language Rules. We will become the top authorities of the linguistics community! We shall be heard of all around the Globe! We will be awarded hundreds of thousands of dollars in prizes! And guess what I'm gonna do with them? I will organize the Ultimate Videogame Convention: better than the E3, because it will have trainloads of b33r: a convention during the day, and a wild party during the night, with gallons and gallons of booze and hostesses showing her titties! Wild party girls will be attracted to it, and it shall become the biggest convention ever! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" 


	4. Part 3: Getting the Stuff

**Largo's Work Journal. June 15, 2006; 11:30 AM.  
**"I need 2 things in order to write the English lesson: the SDK, and an English method. I can get the former from Tsubasa, and the latter, I can get it at school. However, there are 2 problems. First, Tsubasa is in the United States right now, and it will take at least some good 20 hours for the SDK package to make it here, if he sends it through an express delivery. Second, I was fired from the school, because they underestimated the importance of l337n3zz as a human atribute. That would make it kinda hard to get an English method from a language center. I can't ask at the library either; they won't understand my words. So I guess I'm down to going to school. I'm calling Tsubasa right now. This project will be expensive, and I'll have to spend a lot of cash in deliveries and stuff like that; however, it's about the next stage of human science, so I'm gonna do what I've never done or will ever do again: spend my sacred b33r money 

Today's tasks:  
Get the SDK.  
Get some English method books.  
Analyze the books and find out how they work.".

After Largo stopped typing in his computer, he went over to the phone and dialed Tsubasa's number. After 1 minute of connection and 1 minute of a waiting tone, Tsubasa finally picked up.  
- Tsubasa? - said Largo.  
- Largo? Oh, it's you! How ya doin'? - answered Tsubasa, in a lively and happy mood, delighted to talk with Largo after a while.  
- Fine, dude. Listen, I'm doing a transpacific long distance call, so I'll go right to the point, ok?  
- Alright. Go ahead.  
- Do you have Ping's SDK?  
- Ping?... Oh, the robot girl?  
- Check.  
- Hmmm... and... yes, I got it. Ping was a very valued possesion to me, so I missed her a lot, and I brought the SDK as a souvenir.  
- Cool! Would it be much of a problem if you send it to me?  
- Why do you need it? - asked Tsubasa.  
- I'm gonna write a new module for Ping. Don't worry, it won't do nothing wrong. Piro is supervising it. - Obviously, he actually wasn't.  
- A new module? You sound very interested in it. And your project is not one of your mad scientist delusions.  
- So, what? You down?  
- Totally.  
- Great! When and where do I pick it up?  
- They'll come to your place to give it to you. Since you sound very enthusiastic, I'll mark it as an express delivery.  
- It would be kinda exp...  
- Don't worry. I gave you and Piro a lot of money for 2 or 3 months. It wouldn't hurt to give you just a little bit more - interrupted Tsubasa.  
- OK. Piro already has my address, so you won't have any problem sending it.  
- Yeah, I got it. In fact, I have nothing to do right now, so I guess I'm sending it right now. It should arrive by tomorrow.  
- Thanks a lot, buddy! See ya later! - said Largo.  
- See ya! - said Tsubasa.

**Largo's Work Journal. June 15, 2006; 11:33 AM.  
**"Got it, Ping! Tsubasa is delivering me your SDK. It should arrive by tomorrow. That's a lot of time for me, though; it's a loss of valuable research time. But I gotta keep productive. In the meantime, I guess I'm gonna go get the language methods. It's gonna be tuff, but no one can beat the biggest l337 m45t4: ME".

Largo's next step was to get some English books from high school. The difficulty of this task would be really high, because he was fired from school after he sent his students against a horde of fanboys, the ones that swarmed the place after they found out where did Erika had gone. However, he had something on his favor: he doesn't belongs anymore to the school. Largo was planning carefully all the words he would use and how he would say them; everything depended on how could he speak with the language center's boss. While he was walking towards the school, he was mentally reviewing all the words he would use, the parts of his speech, and the tone and inflection he would use. A few minutes later, Largo reached the school, and then walked towards the entrance.

"So far so good. The entrance guard didn't stopped me. Now, on to the language center".

Once Largo finally got inside the language center's front desk, Largo talked to the guy behind the counter. - Hey, sir - Largo said.  
- Oh, Largo. It's you. Can I help you? - asked the front desk guy.  
- Yeah. Take me before your leader. I got some stuff to talk with him.  
- Let me phone him, wait a second. - The front desk guy then picked up the phone and dialed the director's extension. - «Hello? Koizumi-sama? I just got a visit for you. It's that teacher Largo».  
- «Ah, that bolsterous teacher. Who he thinks he is? An army general? What does he wants, anyway?» - answered the principal.  
- «He needs to discuss some stuff with you, Koizumi-sama».  
- «What's it about?»  
- «Lemme ask...» - The front desk guy turned over to Largo. - What's the purpose of your visit, Mr. Caston?  
- I just need the principal to do me a favor. No big deal. It's just a little thing.  
- «Koizumi-sama? Caston-san claims that he just needs a little favor. "It's just a little thing", he says».  
- «Well, unfortunately, the law says that nobody who works for an organization can refuse to attend someone. Let him in».  
The front desk guy pressed a button under the counter that unlocked the principal's door.  
- Mr. Caston, you may come inside.  
Then Largo walked inside the director's office.

- Ah, so it's our loud and bolsterous teacher, Rodney "Largo" Caston. Now I guess you're gonna give me a speech about how unfair it was when I fired you - said the principal as a greeting.  
- Can we just keep the taunts for later? You're just wasting your breath - answered Largo, coldly and with a malicious tone.  
- Anyway, what brings you here, Mr. Caston?  
- I'm here because I need to borrow something from you.  
- So you want me to give you my stuff, even though you're not an employee anymore, even though you're on my blacklist?  
- Stop questioning my request. I just need a little something. Like I said before, it's no big deal.  
- What do you need?  
- Your English teachers' books.  
- What for?  
- I have a little project. I intend to write an English language locale for an electronic device.  
- But why do you need the books? Is it a dictionary or something?  
- The program uses a special system that requires me to transfer the English grammar into electronic code.  
- Ah, a proofreading system.  
- Check. - Not quite what Largo was building, but it would be more believable than an English module for a robot girl.  
- What can you offer to me so I can trust that you won't be photocopying my books, or that you will actually steal them?  
- I offer you my watch. I bought it at Los Angeles. It cost $200 dollars.  
- Nice watch. OK, I think I'll keep it. How much time are you going to take?  
- Probably a couple of weeks or so.  
- Give me an exact, numeric, integer date.  
- Alright... June 29.  
- Good. I'll be browsing through all the English schools here in Tokyo. All of them, without even missing one. If I see just one photostatic copy of my teacher's books, I'll tell the cops you stole my English books and photocopied them, and you'll be thrown into the jail for piracy and robbery. Understand?  
- Understand.  
- Good. Now I hope to see my books at that specific day. Before, if you can. I hope you really put them to a good use. Now, go away.

**Largo's Work Journal. June 15, 2006; 12:30 AM.  
**"I just got the English books. Good job, Largo. You are definitely t3h r0x0rz. That poor little bastard of the language center didn't even managed to stand up against your l337 verbal skillz. You got yourself the English methods. Now, while the SDK is still on its way into my hands, I gotta study the English methods and figure out how they work. Good job.

Today's tasks:  
Get the SDK: done.   
Get some English method books: done.   
Analyze the books and find out how do they work: in progress".


	5. Part 4: Development Starts

**Largo's Work Journal. June 15, 2006; 10:03 PM.  
**

"Piro just came home, and it was just about time, because I've been studying those English language books and I already know how they work. They teach you the language using common, everyday situations so that the student feels comfortable with the method. Just like a German Langenscheidt method I once saw. This one seems to be the trend, and in a certain way, it has its bases, because it teaches you how to survive once you're abroad. These books cover very general situations, things like going to the street market, cooking, going to school, touring the city, and so on. Fortunately, I already know Piro's life, and it's good, because Piro is especially attached to Ping. All I have to do is to depict Piro attending MegaGamers, Piro trying to get laid with Kimiko, Piro playing Dead or Alive with me, Piro getting r0x0r') on Quake, me having a conversation with Boo, me teaching Junpei the path of 1337322, and me using the Necrowombicon to exterminate the Undead Queen and her Empire of Ph34r.

Once Ping's SDK comes home, I'll just have to find out how to tinker around with Ping's modules, and that will be it. I shall become famous, and my discoveries will give me so much money, that I will finally be able to assemble my army and kick the shit out of the Undead Queen!

In the meantime, I guess I gotta get some sleep. They just called in from FedEx, and they say my package will arrive really early in the morning, at 7:00 AM".

On June 16, at 6:50 AM, Largo's computer beeped with a loud sound. Piro was already inside, and Largo, once he woke up, jumped out of his bed like a compressed spring. Piro, on the other hand, was so deeply asleep after 2 continuous nights of alcohol with Kimiko and Erika, that he didn't even listened to the alarm clock. Largo, in the meantime, took a shower and a quick breakfast, and once he finished eating, he heard a knocking sound on the door."That must be the SDK!", Largo thought. - Hello? - said Largo.  
- Good morning, Mr. Caston. I'm from Federal Express, and I have an express delivery for you - said the delivery man.  
- Great! I've been waiting for it.  
- Here it is, inside this box. You may open it right now, to check if something happened to it.  
Largo opened the box. There they were: the instruction handbook, Ping's connection cables, and the software CD. All of them seemed to be in mint condition.  
- Yeah, seems like it's just fine.  
- Good. Now, I need your signature here, to confirm us that you received the package in good conditions. Here, take this pen - said the mailman. Largo then flicked the pen on the clipboard. - Thank you, sir, and I hope you're satisfied with our service.  
- No, thank you - said Largo.

**Largo's Work Journal. June 16, 2006; 7:12 AM.  
**"There it is! I finally got the SDK! Now, it's time to get down and dirty. It's time to start the development phase. Ping will soon learn the world's l337 tongue, and this way, the language barrier between the both of us will be finally torn down like the Berlin wall! Now I gotta start studying the SDK, and see how things are going

Today's tasks:  
- Study thoroughly the SDK documentation.  
- Write a couple of test modules.  
- Start the development cycle of the English module".

**Largo's Work Journal. June 16, 2006; 1:43 PM.  
** "Woooohoooo! I can't believe it! The folks at Sony did thought about portability and ease of use of the SDK! The whole thing is based on Java, and I already have considerable Java skills, most of which I learned while building my computer system (I needed a skillfully crafted, custom built firewall). The SDK is quite easy to understand, and it's really complete: it comes with every package I need, and it even comes with a software emulator that displays a software version of Ping in my desktop, so I don't have to tamper with her configuration. Now it's time to start the development. Today is the beginning of the longest and most important stage. If I have to lock myself inside this place, then so be it.

Today's tasks:  
- Study thoroughly the SDK documentation: done.  
- Write a couple of test modules: done.  
- Start the development cycle of the English module: in progress".


	6. Part 5: Project Completion

**Largo's Work Journal. June 25, 2006; 10:03 PM.  
**

"Development of the SDK is going great. I had some stalls and delays, some of them almost drove me insane, one of them kept me puzzled for 1 entire day, but the grammar is almost finished, and now I just need Ping to be able to understand dialects of English, like Jive, Redneck, Cockney, Valspeak or, of course, l337. Yeah, the gamer's dialect, synonymous of a righteous tongue that evolved naturally on the Usenet forums, the best dialect of English in the world. It just pwnz0rz j00. This dialect will, of course, be Ping's main dialect.

Teaching Ping the vocabulary will be pretty easy. I'll start with a basic 1000 word vocabulary, and I can teach Ping the remaining words.

These 9 days of coding and development so far have been so demanding and tough. I've never exerted my mathematical and programming genius at the levels I'm doing right now. I've barely got anything to eat, and I've never even left this room. It may seem strange, because I've lived enclosed in my room playing Quake 3 against Piro for days, but somehow... I'm starting to feel like I need some sunlight. Besides, the Undead Queen is out there, secretly infiltrating and corrupting the city with her 3vil influence. But Ping can be useful at this. She likes to hang out with her, because the Undead Queen can't do her any harm, and in case she was a victim of a mind manipulation, I just have to load Ping's latest save point. Now that I think of it, perhaps I need a fix of Quake instead of some sunlight...

Development status: 75 done!"

Piro has been worried about Largo during all these days. Over the last week, everything he's been doing was to sit in front of his computer for straight hours, writing computer codes on her machine, and saying strange, muffled words in the night while Piro was asleep. Though this is pretty normal from a geek like Largo, he's not like this. He always leaves the house at least once a day, if only to search for the Undead Queen. Besides, he's been seeing English method books spread all over the place, and Ping's SDK box in front of his computer. Piro was working with Erika at that time, so he eventually brought up the subject.  
- Say, Erika... - said Piro.  
- Wassup, Piro? - answered Erika.  
- I've been noticing that Largo's been acting strange already.  
- Largo never acts according to normal human rationale. Get used to it.  
- I know Largo from high school, that's 6 years ago, and I'm already used to it.  
- So?  
- He's not acting normal, if we consider his weird behavior as normal.  
- What could it be? Something must be going on with him.  
- I dunno...  
- Knowing him well, he might be into something he doesn't wants to tell you.  
- You think so?  
- Probably he's working into a secret project and you wouldn't like to find out what's it about...  
- Maybe...

Piro began to suspect that Largo's into something strange. He started to think about the weird things he's seen around Largo. Ping's SDK... that could mean that he's into developing stuff for Ping. He doesn't gets along with her because he doesn't speaks Japanese, but he doesn't dislikes her, so it can't be something bad. The language books... he must be using them for something... who knows? perhaps a personal project of his, maybe he wants to become a serious English teacher instead of just a stupid "l337 m45+3r"... wait, Piro just remembered. Tsubasa said that Ping didn't had an English module installed. So Largo is working obviously in an English module. But... now let's consider that nothing that Largo does fits withing the bounds of social normalcy... oh no, that just rang all of Piro's emergency alerts! If Largo creates an English module, and considering his obsession with l337n3zz... he might as well build an l337 language module! Oh no! Piro had to stop that right now, as soon as possible!  
- Sorry, Erika... I gotta go...  
- Where ya goin'?  
- I got some stuff to attend with Largo.  
- You found out about what he's doing?  
- Yes, and it doesn't looks good at all.  
- Well, good luck then.  
Then Piro disappeared in the stairs

Upstairs, meanwhile, Largo was on the final step: the upload. Largo plugged Ping into his computer, and transferred the finished learning file.  
- OK, Ping. This is gonna feel a little strange. You'll get lots of flashes of language lessons within a really short time. I trust you're strong enough to resist it, the emulator did, so give me your best, OK? - told her Largo.  
- Yes - answered Ping.  
Then Largo ran the file using Ping's control interface. Ping sat on the floor, and closed her eyes. 30 seconds later, she moved her head downwards, and a forced expression appeared on her face. Then she gasped, and with her mouth open, panting, she dropped all fours into the floor. After recovering her "breath", she got up.  
- I know English, Largo - Ping said.  
- Good! Now you can communicate with me. Well done - answered Largo.  
- Waaaa, it feels so cool! I can speak English like an American! And look! 3y3 4 5p33k l337!

- Largo! - screamed Piro with a very authoritarian, almost heroic air.  
- Piro! You came just in time to show you my latest creation! - answered Largo, with a really energic air.  
- Piro-neesan! - said Ping as soon as she saw Piro.  
- (Ping! Are you OK?) - replied Piro. - Of course I'm OK, Piro! Largo tought me English!  
- Fo' real?  
- Fo' shizzle!  
- Ok, ok, ok... first of all, what kind of English did Largo taught to you?  
- American, Valspeak, Redneck, Jive, British Cockney, l33...  
- Eli-what?  
- l337+3h 64m3?z +0n6u3!  
Piro sighed in frustration. "Ohhhh, Largo... when you do things right, you twist them off at the last minute", he thought.  
- Ping, for the love of God, Sony and all that is holy, please, do not speak l337 in front of anyone, but Largo...  
- Why not?  
- Because l337 is a dialect only spoken by losers like Largo.  
- Really?  
- Really. Now, remember, anytime I'm around, please, do this little favor. Don't. Speak. L337. Got it?  
- Got it.


End file.
